DRAFT Magazine

Most craft breweries boast advertising budgets that rival, well, something very small. Eventually, however, some will grow big and strong and want to get the word out about their product using some form of media, perhaps television. When that happens, it might be wise to learn from Bud Light’s recent struggles.

Both Advertising Age and The Big Money skewer the brand for its “Drinkability” campaign. The former publication says it can be “considered a major factor in Bud Light posting the first full-year sales decline in its history.” Ouch.

The publications focus on the use of marketers and consulting firms to help advertising agencies figure out what consumers want. The upshot? These so-called experts have no idea, but will happily take your money pretending they do. Small brewers take note: Stick to your guns, trust your gut, and go for it. You know your brand better than they do.

That said, we honestly didn’t hate the Drinkability campaign, but what do we know? An example spot is below. Yeah, it could be better.

The Anheuser-Busch InBev NV merger is going just fine, thank you very much. At least that’s according to Carlos Brito, a top executive at the company.

He may have a point. “In North America, adjusted earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation, and amortization in the second quarter surged 43 percent to $1.74 billion,” The Wall Street Journal reports.

Everything isn’t rosy, however, as sales of Bud Light — A-B’s best-selling brew — are falling. Brito, however, doesn’t think this is problem.

“When you launch a line extension like Bud Light Lime, there is some cannibalization,” he said. He’s not worried about the falling market share of the company’s highest-seller because Bud Light Lime sells for 20 percent more, so “I don’t mind if you cannibalize if you improve your margin.”

We’re not economists, but that makes sense to us.

Yesterday, we told you about a thief who used a Bud Light 12-pack to cover his head while robbing nine packs of cigarettes from a convenience story.

Well, those amazing sleuths at TMZ.com scrounged up some pictures and a video of the hold up. Stop whatever you’re doing and watch. It’s worth it, we promise. Also, if the anti-smoking lobby has any sense, they will soon use the video in an advertising campaign.

(For the record, we enjoy Bud Light. We just wouldn’t use the box as a head cover. The blue totally clashes with that green towel covering the thief’s “gun.”)

Well this is a new one.

A thief used a beer container to shield his face while robbing a Kwik Shop in Nebraska. After committing the crime — he stole a grand total of nine packs of cigarettes — the purp dropped his disguise in an effort to flee the scene.

According to police spokeswoman Katie Flood, detectives will search the Bud Light 12-pack for fingerprints and other identifying details.

In conclusion, not only is the theft a moron, but he has terrible taste in beer. At the very least, he could have gone with Bud heavies.